DENVER 鈥 As he spoke near the center of the Cardinals鈥 clubhouse and considered the role he feels ready to play in the middle of the Cardinals鈥 revival, lefty Brett Cecil recited a recipe he could only learn from turbulent times as a reliever.
Because of injuries and flighty results, he has been in and out, up and back down, embattled and abandoned in his time with the Cardinals. But it wasn鈥檛 a sense of health or even a sense for his curve that has changed his outlook and his results in the past week.
It鈥檚 a sense of self.
鈥淭here are three things that make a reliever tick,鈥 Cecil listed. 鈥淭he confidence he has in himself. The situation he pitches in. And the manager鈥檚 confidence in him. At first, I didn鈥檛 have any of those. Now, I feel like I have all of them.鈥
As the Cardinals this week completed their first sweep of the Dodgers at Dodger Stadium in a dozen years, Cecil stood out, stood tall in two of the three wins. The Cardinals found reasons to use him, not ways to avoid him. The veteran lefty got the win in relief Monday by retiring the lefthanded batter he faced, and threw a flawless inning Wednesday that held the Dodgers in place for the Cardinals鈥 eventual rally to win 3-1 on home runs by Tyler O鈥橬eill and Paul DeJong. Since returning from the disabled list, Cecil has appeared in four games and retired nine of the 11 batters he faced. The only hitters to reach against him did so on intentional walks. That means he鈥檚 yet to throw a pitch that resulted in a baserunner.
People are also reading…
Cecil鈥檚 year began with a family tragedy on the eve of spring training and the ripple effects of missing a month. Yet when the Cardinals radically rebooted their bullpen around youth, the one pre-makeover reliever brought back who had been producing was Cecil. He has since become an agent of change for the Cardinals. As they start a three-game series against heel-biting Colorado this weekend at Coors Field, the Cardinals have won 17 of their 21 games this month, outscored opponents by 50 runs (106 to 56), boasted a top-five offense by many measures, and had the lockdown bullpen of their imaginations. It has a league best 1.97 ERA.
鈥淭his is where we all envisioned ... us,鈥 DeJong said after Wednesday鈥檚 victory and his two-run homer. 鈥淲e all played a little down to our potential. Now, we鈥檙e playing good as a group, bringing each other up.鈥
Cecil鈥檚 personal curve mirrors the Cardinals, from the shedding of questions that trailed his every outing right down to the percolating confidence.
On the day the Cardinals flushed their bullpen, Cecil went on the disabled list with a foot injury. At about the same time, the lefty had a personal meeting with manager Mike Shildt and John Mozeliak, the team鈥檚 president of baseball operations. The discussion was frank and pointed, and by its end Cecil had explored with them the possibility of seeing a sports psychologist.
鈥淚 thought about it and thought about and I鈥檝e thought about it a few times before, but we鈥檙e all men, right? All competitors,鈥 Cecil said. 鈥淚f we can we want to do things on our own. I think it鈥檚 like men in any aspect of life. You don鈥檛 want to ask for directions. You know what I mean? You said, 鈥業 know where I am. I鈥檓 good.鈥 I asked. It鈥檚 worked.鈥
The Cardinals had Cecil spend time with the team鈥檚 mental strength coach, Carrie Stewart. She recommended passages of books for Cecil to read. He would text her after every rehab appearance and discuss both the results and how he felt going into the game. He mentioned to her that as a student in college he would write out notes from class two or three times, just to be sure to learn them. The act of writing committed the information to memory.
She suggested he try that before games.
In the past week, each day Cecil will write out some of his thoughts, some phrases, and some words that he wants to recall during the game. Starting in the fifth or sixth inning, he鈥檒l begin recalling them as he tracks the opponent鈥檚 lineup for when he might be used.
鈥淚 find myself relaxed,鈥 Cecil said.
鈥淭hese guys know what they need and want at this level,鈥 Shildt said. 鈥淲e all need help, but I think in Brett鈥檚 case it was really just an open dialogue. What are you thinking? Where are you? What do you need? I give him tons of credit because he was honest about what it looks like.鈥
Cecil spent this past offseason in St. 不良研究所导航网址 intent on erasing a disappointing first season with the Cardinals. He worked out at a facility with former teammates, shed weight, added strength, and would often text with Adam Wainwright about how much stronger he felt. 鈥淧owerful,鈥 is how he put it. Just as he was about to show that in spring training, illness struck his wife Jennifer鈥檚 parents, Dan and Gina Jones.
Cecil, who had previously declined to discuss specifics, said his mother-in-law was hospitalized with pneumonia and other ailments. At one point, he said, she had to be put on life support, and that happened two days before her husband suddenly died, in late January. Cecil spent most of the next month helping his wife, caring for their three children and spending almost every day at a Tampa, Fla., area hospital. Family became the focus. His mother-in-law has since recovered, he said.
The lefty wasn鈥檛 able to throw much, to work out much, or care.
When he finally did join the Cardinals in Jupiter, Fla., for spring training he felt he raced to make up for lost time, and that only sped him toward injury and inconsistency.
That put him in a familiar spot 鈥 which was no spot at all.
鈥淚 felt like I was given a few opportunities here and there, and I just felt like when I got on a roll and then hit a bump in the road I had to go to the back of the line again. Redo everything I just did. Stinks to feel that way, I guess.鈥
He did not have any of the three prongs a reliever needs.
He lacked confidence.
He lacked a role.
And he felt his manager had neither for him, too.
The work with Stewart, conversations with Chris Carpenter, and success in rehab innings started to shift that, and fast. Emboldened by the new view he鈥檚 been given and a fresh start from Shildt, Cecil returned and candidly said he did not expect to appear in high-leverage spots for the Cardinals. Shildt had other ideas. He thrust the lefty right into late-inning spots and has come to lean on him this past week as the Cardinals鈥 lefty neutralizer. Shildt made that call by seeing what Cecil did long before he returned to the mound. He called him 鈥減roactive.鈥 He called him 鈥減oised.鈥
He called him one of Shildt鈥檚 highest compliments: 鈥淧repared.鈥
Cecil just calls this familiar.
鈥淚 think Brett would tell you that he鈥檚 in a good place right now,鈥 Shildt said. 鈥淗e鈥檚 convicted to what he鈥檚 doing. The guy is a proven major-league pitcher, proven postseason experience. That鈥檚 who Brett Cecil is. It鈥檚 about getting to that identity again.鈥